Day 19

Morning

I slept super late today - a little after 7:00! In my defense, I could NOT fall asleep last night...I was overcome with a sense of excitement! About what exactly I can't be sure...nearly completing the cleanse? Life from here on out? All of it? I don't know...but I do feel like I'm in the early stages of a new beginning...

Had to rush through some of my morning routine...and flat out skipped mediation and morning pages, which I will make up for this evening with a 20 minute guided meditation and doing morning pages as well as some other writing I've been meaning to do.


Lunch

Another big ole salad! I pretty much emptied the crisper for this one. Topped it off with the kick ass goddess dressing, cracked pepper and vegan parm-like cheese. Had a few gluten free crackers and a couple of dark chocolate squares for dessert. All so yummy!


**I'm hijacking my own post with some ruminations...warning - possible self-indulgent insight ahead.**

For some reason, I'm having a bit of a wave of sadness or sentiment or something at the thought of this being the last weekend of my cleanse. I think it's going to be a weekend of reflection for me, ending with plans for the future. I've learned so much about myself during this time. It's been a much deeper experience than simply changing my eating habits. I think I truly love myself for the first time in my life! I know...so cheesy, you're looking for crackers right now, but the even better thing is - I don't care! I don't care if you think I'm cheesy or corny or sappy or sentimental or whatever! And for me to be able to say that is downright miraculous! I've spent most of my life concerned with how I'm perceived and it's just too much. It's a weight I'm no longer willing to bear. I feel liberated, free! Maybe that was the excitement feeling I had last night. There are several quotes that I've saved and read over and over for a while now and fully believed but only now am experiencing first-hand -

"The more you honor your commitments to yourself, the more you approve of yourself, and the less approval you need from others."

"The highest quality of life comes when you make your own self-approval more important than the approval of others - when you make what's most meaningful to you more important than what others expect of you."

"Resentment doesn't produce much change. And being accountable for meeting your own needs is the most effective way to get them met."

"Feeling guilty is a signal that our image of ourself doesn't match who we really are."

"In order to get where you want to go, you have to know where you are now. Accept yourself, flaws and all, for who you are."

That last one was a bitch! But well worth it! :)

**Hijack over.**

Snacks

I finished my green juice and had a few Nut thin (ranch flavored) crackers. Those crackers are so freakin' good! I just can't even put it into words! Mmmm!

Evening

Power yoga after work. Yoga is such an amazing workout...I'm not sure there's anything as all encompassing as yoga. It's such a great feeling when you can go a little deeper in a stretch than you could the day before or when you hold a balance pose that used have you stumbling. And every day is a little different - some days one hip is tighter than the other or they're both loose but your back is tight or your stronger in one area than another...it's so interesting to me how/where we hold tension in our bodies from day to day.

Dinner - I made gluten free angel hair pasta with extra virgin olive oil, fresh garlic, tomatoes and basil, added some capers, lemon zest and a squeeze of lemon plus vegan parm-like cheese, cracked pepper and a tiny bit of Celtic sea salt. For a side, I (very lightly) sauteed some garlic and onion in extra virgin olive oil and added some red and green bell pepper, cooking for just a couple of minutes on low heat, topped with cracked pepper and a touch of Celtic sea salt. For dessert, I had just a tiny bit (about the size of a quarter) of dried gogi berries and cacao nibs. That all hit the spot after my workout!